21 June 2008

checking in

Just a quick note. I am at George and Leila's house this evening with the kids and I am about to put them to bed (and join them there) but I wanted to say I am alive. Jonathan and Mabel are in Colorado and he loves it!

Our house is empty and I hand over the keys to our tenants tomorrow. Blue and the Lion and I fly out on Tuesday and I cannot, cannot wait to see Jonathan!

As Leila would say, Ciao, peeps!

11 June 2008

thank you

I want to thank everybody who has been so supportive lately during this crazy time--I was so touched by the comments everyone left on my last two posts. I really have been blessed with amazing friends and family...

I took the kids to see my grandparents this weekend. They were so well behaved (the kids, I mean) in the car and also at Grandma and Pop's. I was so proud of them. And I am hoping that this means they will behave on the plane. It was such a brief visit that I didn't even take any pictures and it already feels like the entire visit was just an idea I had.

Jonathan was cleaning out the garage today and packing up his tools. I was out there for a bit, trying to help, and Blue was playing/helping too. She was on her big Dora tricycle and all of a sudden she hollered, "Mommy! Daddy! Look! I'm pedalling!" We were so proud of her! And she figured it out all by herself!

She is so funny. Last night at dinner, she said, "Excuse me. I just farted a lot a lot a lot."

05 June 2008


I bear in my body
the stigmata of perfectionism
shoulders locked
vertebrae fused
neck aching
arms sore
as if it’s not enough
to bring in one grocery
bag at a time

Kate Madden Yee


I have been very frazzled lately. And more than a little blue. Because of leaving my family and friends and this gorgeous house.

My friends finally wore me down. At least, they made Roxanna call me and wear me down in her special sisterly way. We are having a good luck shindig Sunday night at Cheeseburger in Paradise. I told everyone I did not want one last throwdown because I would get too emotional but when Roxanna mentioned Cheeseburger in Paradise I was like, I can do that. No way in hell I will let myself cry like a baby in the middle of Cheeseburger in Paradise.

I am taking the kids down to see my grandparents tomorrow. And then turning around and coming back on Saturday because Blue has a ballet performance on Sunday. So I have been packing for this trip in addition to packing for the move and I am so uber hard on myself to stay on top of everything that I have my father's day stuff ready to mail and any and all birthday cards for June and July ready and stamped as well.

It was so absolutely horribly hot and humid today and on the way to ballet, they announced on the radio that tomorrow with the heat index it will reach temperatures of 110 degrees. So Denver is looking better and better...

The weather (yes, I am talking about the weather) has been so freaky here. And elsewhere in the country and the world, I know, but I have lived in this area my whole life and there were never tornadoes until now. Olivia came over last night (thank God) because Jonathan was up in Northern Virginia and we had more horrific storms and tornado watches. Watches ... warnings ... whatever. It was scary as shit and there was hail, which I haven't seen in years. Only during the time it took Olivia to run into my house, of course, but still ... hail? So she and I hunkered down in my basement with the kids and tried not to freak them out too badly. It is hilarious today, but we were both shaking last night. I was so relieved when Jonathan pulled into the driveway.

So anyway, I made my way into ballet and signed up to bring cheese cubes and Chex Mix on Sunday and chipped in for a gift for the instructor, who is undergoing chemo for breast cancer. And then we found out that one of the little girls in Blue's ballet class may be losing her brother very soon. As in "he took a turn for the worse last night." He was born with HLHS and received a heart transplant several years ago. And now he is in a coma and his organs are failing and as of today he is on dialysis. His name is Larry and he has a little round face and blond hair. Please pray for him.

And I thought about him almost all day and I thought about the ballet instructor who is so active and takes such care of herself and winds up with breast cancer. About how she is so unceasingly patient with these children while I am watching from the sides with Lion on my lap and some mornings I just want to yell at some of the kids in the class to be quiet and pay attention. And about how no matter how much or how little I stress about this move, it will happen regardless. About how even though I am leaving my friends and family, they are still healthy and that is everything. That is everything.